


Behind Her Hazel Eyes

by hellostarlight



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Dark Rey (Star Wars), Dark Reylo, F/M, Force Visions, Idiots in Love, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Rey Needs A Hug, She knows what she wants, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Spoilers, and she's not afraid to take it, dark rey is thirsty, maybe our girl can take a hint from dark rey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:48:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22098934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellostarlight/pseuds/hellostarlight
Summary: Rey is struggling in her training because she keeps having the same vision over and over again. She can't seem to get it out of her head, get him out of her system. And she's learning to deal with the consequences of what it might mean about what she desires most.ORRey's vision of her and Kylo Ren on the dark throne ;)
Relationships: Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Kylo Ren
Comments: 13
Kudos: 73





	Behind Her Hazel Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys this I really don't think this is technically considered mature, but I wanted to be safe because anxiety.
> 
> It's real short and sweet but it took me FOREVER so please let me know what you think :) 
> 
> I wrote this at ungodly hours of the morning so I apologize for any grammatical errors
> 
> ALSO
> 
> Come hang out with me on tumblr @hellostarlight

She is meditating when she feels the it happening again. The hair on the back of her neck prickles just slightly but it is always just enough to let her know what is about to unfold. It is a recurring vision that never seems to leave her, no matter how much shame and consequence she is left to deal with afterwards.

It begins with the same voices that she hears in her nightmares.

Loud and chanting.

Ominous and intimidating.

And there are a _lot_ of them.

They are always reciting something in an ancient Sith language that she is never able to understand, but she does know that whatever these voices are repeating into her head cannot mean anything hopeful or promising.

She then sees flashes of red and green.

Laser cannons and blaster fire.

Smoke and ash.

There are screams of distress coming from every direction, and she can _feel_ the anguish in these cries. There are shouts of the most horrid obscenities reflecting violence and loss. Unimaginable loss. The cacophony of war surrounds her senses, choking her.

Innocents slaughtered.

Villages burned to the ground.

Children made orphans as the massacre never ceases.

Entire worlds blasted into the vast emptiness of space.

She should most definitely be wary of whatever the Force is trying to prove to her. She should not welcome these torturous thoughts. As a Jedi would, she should resent these horrible feelings and not give into them. She should be defying fear.

But what worries her in this repeated vision is that she feels absolutely no fear nor resentment. It terrifies her that some deep carnal part of her is welcoming the darkness that envelops her. It mortifies her even further that she feels absolutely no desire to fight it.

In fact, she wants to soak it in. To give into the heavy gravity and follow the end of the path until she is finally able to lay eyes on what this darkness is trying to show her. She knows there is a purpose for this torment and at the end of it, she will see want she wants, no, _needs,_ to see. But why would it cause so much pain and destruction for the galaxy?

Skywalker once told her that she was easily able to channel the dark side because it tempted her with something that she wanted. What she most deeply desired. For the longest time the only thing she had ever desired was a family, for her parents to return for her so she could feel _whole_ again. She had always assumed that the gaping hole in her heart was from the loss she suffered when she was abandoned on backwater Jakku all those years ago.

But it turns out Luke’s words had a deeper meaning than she could’ve ever imagined because she did in fact allow herself to go straight into the dark for what she desired. And it was not at all what she thought she needed. She hears Master Skywalker’s voice now, on top of the harmonious destruction in the background.

 _All for_ _a pair of pretty eyes._

She is not surprised as the vision in front of her starts to morph slowly into something else entirely. The battle that was representing her inner turmoil fades into nothingness and is replaced with something far more controversial.

She is staring straight into the hazy burnt caramel eyes of the Supreme Leader on a large throne. A half gasp, half choking noise escapes her as she takes in his regal appearance. He wears a black metal ring on his pointer finger that twist upward like vines towards the sunlight. His dark robes that are cascading around his feet match the raven waves falling around his face so wondrously. No matter how much she resents it, she cannot help but always feel awestruck at how strikingly beautiful he is. In her dreams, she is constantly taken aback by his dark features, and it thrills her as much as it should terrify her.

There are clusters of lighting striking all over the throne room, which force her to shut her eyes in an attempt to block out the brightness. In this vision, however, her attempts prove to be worthless because she can’t help the gasp that escapes her at the familiar crackle of a red saber roaring to life.

What she assumed the first time to be Ren’s unstable piece of garbage is actually something far worse that she never fully allows herself to accept. It is indeed a red blade, and it does crackle and bleed like his, but the blade is always a double-edged sword.

And it is held by _her_ every single time _._

Rey takes a step hesitant backward and tries to even her breathing as she is thrust into this new image of herself standing tall next to _him._ This Sith-like version of herself is wearing a dark hood and a long robe that chases down the steps of the elaborate throne gracefully, like a waterfall of black. The woman’s head is drawn in close to her chest, in a position that could give the idea she was meditating if the real Rey didn’t know any better.

But then she opens her eyes and Rey is staring herself down. It was like looking in the mirror, except for her bright hazel eyes did not come close to the shade of burning yellow she was matched with. This dark Rey allows a quiet, yet menacing smile grace her lips.

 _Don’t be afraid of who you are_.

Rey had heard the voices of others in her visions before, but to hear her own voice in her mind laced with sweet wickedness was a new level of sickening no matter how many times this nightmare repeats itself. Despite what she had just heard herself say, it frightened her more than anything to visualize with her eyes what the dark side could turn her into. It scared her even more to hear her own voice ringing through her ears, so enticing yet so dangerous, and it never fails to send a shock through her body. 

She stares herself down as the woman she is afraid to become smirks at her and extinguishes her double red blade, haphazardly flinging it aside. Rey flinches as she watches the Sith version of herself plop happily onto the lap of the Supreme Leader, as if that’s where she belongs.

 _Or of what you want_.

Her own voice tears violently through her mind once again and Rey is physically shaken as her dark counterpart snakes her hand seductively up Kylo’s chest and winds it into his hair. He groans at the intimate contact and pulls her closer to him by the small of her back. He runs his hand up and down her body until it lands on her ass. He kneads her flesh softly and rubs his face into her chest, eventually resting on her sternum as he breathes her in deeply.

Dark Rey mewls in pleasure and then brings her hand that is not in his hair under his chin to lift his face to her eye level. The scar that _she_ marked him with slashes diagonally from his brow to his cheekbone and dark Rey traces it gently.

Seductively.

It’s also at that exact moment that she notices the matching piece of winding black metal on her mirroring image’s finger. It was the same piece of ornate jewelry that Kylo was wearing. It was alarming yet so _exhilarating_ at the same time.

A rush of heat never fails to flow through the real Rey, and she feels physically incapable of tearing her eyes from the scene in front of her. Although she doesn’t like to imagine this precise location, she is no stranger to fantasizing over and even longing for this type of connection with him.

She knows it’s dangerous how she has no desire to end this vision once she starts to feel the power from their bond roar within her. This is a reoccurring dream she seems to be lost in and distracted by lately as she tries so tediously to focus on her training. It’s her weakness. He’s her weakness.

_Rey._

The rich tone of his voice tears her away from her conflicting thoughts and her eyes meet his in a heated gaze that she hated to admit made her feel weak in the knees. She despises the fact that he has the power to always make her feel so powerful yet so timid at the same time.

_You know what you want. Take it._

The air is always knocked out of her lungs whenever the vision is ripped away from her. She’s used to it at this point, but that doesn’t mean that it hurts any less as she feels the rift of conflict inside her grow even deeper each time the vision occurs. That doesn’t mean she isn’t left with a shame that she cannot describe.

She _does_ know what she wants. But it just so happens that unfortunately for her, the deepest desires in her heart will never forge a connection with reality unless the darkest consequence is paid in return. And she keeps telling herself that she is not willing to lose sight of the light to love him.

The problem is that it might already be too late.

And that’s the part that scares her the most. 

**Author's Note:**

> love it? hate it? let me know regardless


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